Fxck

I'm drunk.
I'm trying to hold this together but basically I went to a bday dinner (for me) with Ryans parents and Ryan.
We get home to no contact solution.
I get yelled. Ryan takes off. I cry because just hours ago at church they spoke about relationships.
Ours is on the path to.... Well shit hole. Or destruction... Whatever.
I'm ready to sleep.

Fuxk love. I'm convinced it's all for show.